If you suspect your friend or loved one is an alcoholic, it’s important to say something to them. However, some people exhibit signs of alcoholism but aren’t suffering the usual detrimental effects of abusing alcohol. Their lives may not be falling apart, they may have strong connections, and they may even have a job that encourages them to drink frequently for the sake of networking.
But just because they haven’t seen adverse consequences to their frequent drinking doesn’t mean that they don’t have a problem. With high-functioning alcoholics, consequences often come hard and fast after long periods of drinking seemingly without any adverse effect on their lives and health. This is why it’s important to learn what a high-functioning alcoholic is, and speak up when someone is engaging in abuse of an addictive substance. The addiction is still damaging their life even if it hasn’t yet severed their connections or ruined their health.
Signs of a High-Functioning Alcoholic
While a high-functioning alcoholic does indeed have an alcohol addiction (also known as alcohol use disorder), it will not present itself the same way as a conventional alcoholic. At least 20% of people suffering from alcohol use disorder can be classified as high-functioning alcoholics, and other studies suggest that it can be up to three-quarters of those with this disorder. These people don’t see too many adverse effects to their lifestyle from their drinking habits, despite the damage occurring to their bodies and coping skills. They may be a high performer at work or a student who achieves high marks in school.
The signs of alcohol use disorder are often present in a high-functioning alcoholic’s behavior long before they see bloating from alcohol or strained relationships. Signs of a high-functioning alcoholic can include:
- Needing to consume more alcohol to feel any effects
- Lying about the amount of alcohol/number of drinks consumed
- Drinking in situations where it would be considered dangerous, such as driving
- Feeling like they “need” alcohol to cope with stress or to alter feelings
- Drinking at lunchtime during workdays
- Drinking alone
- Giving reasons for why drinking isn’t a problem, such as the alcohol being of high quality
- Drinking alone
- Guilt and embarrassment about how much they drink
- Doing well at work or school, but allowing alcohol to affect their performance in other areas of life (such as relationships
- Lying about and/or concealing proof of how much alcohol they’ve consumed
- Resistance to feedback about how much they’re drinking (or anger upon being given this feedback)
- Insisting their problem with drinking isn’t as bad as it could be/ isn’t as bad as someone else’s addiction
- Feeling the need to finish drinks, even if they don’t belong to them
- Not reducing drinking even when it causes physical or mental problems
- Inability to stop drinking (even if the person wants to stop)
- Sneaking alcohol into events where it is not being served
- Experiencing cravings for alcohol during certain times or in particular situations
- Obsessing about when they can next get a drink
It is important to know that not all signs may manifest in all people suffering from functional alcoholism. It’s important to speak up about your concerns if you think a friend or loved one is increasing their drinking in an unhealthy way. A functional alcoholic is by definition not suffering adverse effects that affect the life of an alcoholic farther along in their addiction.
The Importance of Early Intervention in Alcoholism
A high-functioning alcoholic may not be open to discussing their drinking if they feel that it’s not a problem. They may have an image of an alcoholic as someone that’s frequently drinking, or who is running out of money from their drinking. They may have an alcoholic in their family and see themselves as being very different. As stated before, one sign of high-functioning alcoholism is comparing themselves favorably to others who have a less severe addiction.
However, the answer to these excuses is the same: “That’s why I’m saying something now.” It’s important to speak up when you feel that someone needs to stop an unhealthy habit. With alcoholism, withdrawal symptoms are easiest to cope with when it’s early in the process. Symptoms of a less severe addiction are uncomfortable, but there’s a much lower chance of lasting damage.
A key part of alcohol detox is treating a phenomenon known as delirium tremens, highly distressing symptoms of detox that can do permanent damage to a person’s body. But these usually only take place within a person’s body if their addiction is severe. The detox process is typically much more painful as a whole. The sooner someone suffering from alcohol use disorder seeks help, the less physically painful the process will usually be.
How to Help a High-Functioning Alcoholic
No one can enter recovery for addiction unless they themselves want to pursue recovery. You may feel frustrated and unsure of what to do for your friend or loved one suffering from high-functioning alcoholism, but it’s not possible to cure them of their condition through love or devotion. They have to be ready and willing to start the process of recovery for their own benefit, otherwise they won’t move forward and/or won’t retain the lessons learned in an alcohol treatment center.
If you want to support someone who’s a high-functioning alcoholic, it will require a different approach and a different attitude than when dealing with a conventional alcoholic.You don’t have to completely abandon a friend if they refuse to give up drinking. But that doesn’t mean you have to be completely permissive of their drinking.
If you’re sober or looking to moderate your own alcohol use, it’s important to maintain those boundaries. A high-functioning alcoholic will slowly increase their consumption over time, because they need more to keep feeling the same effects. You do not have to match their pattern. They may become angry, or think you’re judging them for their usage. But the truth is that you’re maintaining your own boundaries, for your own benefit.
It can feel like the right thing to do to clean up an alcoholic’s empty bottles, change their sheets, or clean their car after a binge. But in truth, this is covering up the effects of their actions. For an alcoholic (high-functioning or not) to see the extent of their disease, they have to see the effects on their life. They or you may be temporarily embarrassed, but it’s better for the truth to be out than for them to continue their behavior without realizing the true extent of it.
Just because someone hasn’t yet suffered drastic effects from alcoholism doesn’t mean that they aren’t addicted. If you’re starting to see signs that someone is becoming addicted to alcohol, it’s important to bring up those concerns. They may argue about social drinking vs. alcoholism and where they fall on the scale. But remember that the point is to bring up your concerns, not to argue or be “right.”
If the high-functioning alcoholic in your life is starting to suffer adverse consequences for their alcoholism, it’s not doing them any favor to protect them from those consequences. If they know that they can count on you to bail them out of jail, pay their rent when they miss a payment, or drive them to work when they lose their license, they have no incentive to stop their behavior.
It may take time for someone to realize that their drinking is out of control, or that they do in fact have a problem with alcoholism. You don’t have to stop being their friend before that time comes. It may take a significant event, such as being arrested for a DUI, to make them fully realize that they have a disease. But when that time comes, it’s important to show up for them as a friend. Don’t say “I told you so” — offer to give them a ride to an inpatient facility, or celebrate their victories of sobriety.
Treatment For Alcoholism at Wisconsin Recovery in Fond du Lac
Alcoholism affects millions of people, and it affects them all in different ways. But if you or one of your loved ones is ready to seek help for their alcoholism, we’re here to help you. At our Fond du Lac facility, we work to help individuals detox safely and learn how to live a healthy life of sobriety. We know getting clean isn’t an overnight process. Contact us today and learn how we work to support the process of building a new life of sobriety.
